Any Landing You Can Walk Away From Is A Good Landing … Goes for Birthdays Too!

That is a movie scene of the late actor Sam Shepard depicting US Air Force test pilot Chuck Yeager’s worst plane crash in the excellent movie “The Right Stuff”. For these last couple of decades, more so in recent years, this scene pops into my head on my self-pitying celebration of my birthday when I rise in the morning and put my feet on the floor to start another “birthday”. Blessedly, at 97 years old, Yeager is still very much alive. Sadly, Shepard, who was younger than the hero pilot, is not, having died three years ago at 73 years old. Shepard was one of my favorite real actors. Yeager is in the top five of my list of heroes.

Over these past few years of lamenting another birthday I have had people tell me something to the tune of, “Hey, if you’re still alive to celebrate another birthday it’s a good birthday.” It is the physical loss of each passing birthday, not the gain of wisdom, however. More and more I find myself wishing I had been as wise as I am now when I was a much younger adult.

For me, as I said, that has always sparked the above Yeager movie scene. He emerges from the rancid smoke, charred, bruised, battered, burned… but still chomping away on that damn stick of Beemans gum with renewed wisdom, determination, and gratitude for surviving. I have seen the quote, “Any landing you can walk away from is a good one!” attributed to US Army Air Force photographer Gerald R. Massie after he walked away from the crash of a plane he had been on in 1944. I believe every pilot and astronaut .. and car driver, has adopted that adage. And as I said, I too have adopted the saying every time my feet hit the floor in the morning. Yes, I do have to remind myself more strongly every birthday.

This birthday I’m not so negative about this day. After roughly a month (seems like longer!) of stay-at-home pandemic practice I count my real blessings.

A devoted, kind, loving, and (too) hardworking selfless husband. He has dinner planned for me tonight. I just wish it was Chinese food, but all the family Chinese restaurants in our radius closed as soon as the governor issued his pandemic mandate, even though takeout and delivery was permissible. I don’t know why they all decided to close. Nobody blames them for this mess. Perhaps it was a supply issue.

We have three bright and beautiful daughters, and two wonderful sons-in-law that I count as my sons. They have two wonderful and blessed young families that gifted me four beautiful and amazing grandchildren who I miss dearly: The five month old Elijah whom I’ve not seen in over a month and his milestones he’s achieving that I have to watch on cell phone FaceTime (he has me on ‘speed dial’ on his Momma’s phone and calls me everyday!) or in the videos texted to me. My oldest Grandson Mickey making it to the state championships in his last year of middle school wrestling only to have them canceled, and now no track season. But I am hoping and praying for cross-country season at the end of summer (the kid can run!). Also, his younger sister Sophia’s truncated dance season just when the competitions were beginning. I am hoping she will still have soccer this summer, as well as baseball for their little brother Matt. Also, no final middle school band concert for Mickey and Sophia. I live for all these things.

During this quarantine time I have had my declaration of our Down Syndrome daughter Lizzie Rose being a huge blessing confirmed. Mike’s two jobs did not close during this time. As a matter of fact he has had significant overtime these past few weeks. So, I would have been home completely isolated if it weren’t for my sweet Lizzie doing her school work at home via tele-teacher conferencing with her fantastic teacher. She has also been helping keeping house and baking and cooking. When Mike’s got a day off from his jobs he takes her errand running, leaving her masked and in the car for quick run-ins. He dutifully listens to her music CDs during the little jaunts. This morning darling Lizzie joined her sisters and brothers-in-law, niece and nephews in our long-running family group text )that we established long before the COVID-19 outbreak) in texting me a birthday wish, then greeted me in the kitchen for breakfast with a beautiful birthday card.

While I don’t have wealth, I have so many blessed gifts to be endlessly thankful for.

During this time none of my family members have gotten sick with the virus. My parents remain safe, Dad and Sue at home with my step-brother doing the store-running for them. And my Mom safe and sound in her assisted living facility, where none of the residents or staff have come down with the virus, the facility locking down days before the Ohio Gov. DeWine calling for nursing homes and assisted living to do so.

My siblings and their families (including my niece who works in China and has spent the massive outbreak there, nearly a month locked in her apartment) have been safe and healthy as well. And my friends near and far, acquaintances and contacts across the internet universe too seem to have weathered this pandemic. Thankfully all.

This time has not been without some heartfelt regret.

My bestfriend of nearly 50 years lost her beloved big brother just before Easter holiday to a stroke and resulting brain bleed. He was always great with us when we were teens in high school, looking after us and carting us around here and there until she got her driver’s license and a car. Due to the lockdown I could not physically be there for her or her family, and the funeral. It’s not a unique situation at this time in the world. Countless people have been in the situation of losing someone during this time and not being able to gather in fellowship to mourn, grieve and remember … some who were not even able to be by their loved one’s bedside to hold their hand and sooth them into their passing with whispered words of love. And not just deaths, but new births and birthdays, and of course Easter and Passover celebrations with family.

During this time we all have been forced to realize exactly what is so very important to us all… Family. Jobs. Freedom to come and go, to purchased that which we see on the store shelf. It’s not petty. It is exactly what our Founders designed for us in their writing of the Constitution based fully in knowing where/who bestows such rights upon us. It is the greatest gift in the history of mankind.

And so, as yet another birthday is upon me the pilot’s adage has become even more meaningful and important to me. I’m still walking. I’m still talking and thinking, sometimes too much, and I am still writing. I’m still here to pass on my wisdom to my children and grandchildren. How do I know it’s sinking in? I can see it in them. And in my middle daughter who just had her first baby five months ago and is now passing on that ‘Mommy wisdom’ that I gave her while being with her during her two month post-birth maternity leave, to her bestfriend who is expecting her first baby next month. It is a very satisfying accomplishment, I must say. Of all the books my daughter had read to prepare for motherhood she was now leaning heavily on what I had conveyed to her from my experience(s) of having three babies, and helping with her older sister’s three babies.

Being a “Mom” and a “Nana” is the only job I ever really took seriously. Not to mention the fringe benefits are the bestest of any job!

So, yeah, 62 today. *sigh* If I live to be Chuck Yeager’s age I will never regret placing my feet on the floor and walking away from my bed each and every morning. My major lifetime accomplishment, when I no longer wake to another birthday, is the value of family, love, wisdom, and pride I will have bequeathed to my children and grandchildren … and great-grandchildren, if I am so blessed.